Are Work Friendships Becoming a Thing of the Past?

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Are Work Friendships Becoming a Thing of the Past

Having friends at work used to be common, but today’s employees seem to be keeping their personal and professional lives separate.

According to recent Glassdoor polls, many workers now avoid forming close relationships with colleagues — a shift influenced by remote work, changing attitudes, and shorter job tenures.

Fewer Employees Staying for Work Friends

In a Glassdoor poll conducted in January 2025, less than 25% of professionals said they had stayed in a job because of a “work bestie.”

More than half of respondents — 53% — said they actively avoid making work friends because they want to keep their work and personal lives separate.

A Glassdoor Community member summed up this mindset:

“If I build trust and make a friend, great, but that’s not my primary objective. Your work and personal lives should be kept separate.”

Why Work Friendships Matter

Despite this trend, research suggests work friendships can be valuable. Adam Grant, Glassdoor’s Chief WorkLife Expert, pointed out that having friends at work boosts both happiness and performance.

He said:

“Having friends at work predicts higher happiness and well-being.

“On average, people perform better when they’re working with friends.”

Changing Attitudes Toward Office Friendships

The way workers approach office friendships has evolved.

One media executive in the Glassdoor Community recalled how different things used to be.

They said:

“Virtually my entire adult group of friends has been built upon work relationships from 20+ years ago when I first entered the NYC workforce. But now that I’m older, I definitely keep those worlds separated.”

Grant also noted that shorter job tenures play a role.

Many workers simply don’t expect to stay at the same company long enough to form lasting friendships.

He said:

“Since we don’t plan to stick around, we don’t invest in the same way. We view coworkers as transitory ties, greeting them with arms-length civility while reserving real camaraderie for outside work.”

The Decline of the ‘Work Spouse’

The idea of having a “work spouse” — a close, trusted colleague often referred to as a “work husband” or “work wife” — is also fading.

In a recent Glassdoor poll, only 21% of workers described themselves as having a “work spouse.” Meanwhile, 44% said they would never use the term.

Grant prefers terms like “primary collaborator” or “closest colleague” instead, saying:

“The marriage metaphor isn’t logical because it’s not a long-term commitment and it’s not monogamous. If you or they change roles or locations, you’re not suddenly divorced.”

Some employees also avoid the phrase out of respect for their real-life spouses.

As one respondent put it:

“I’ve had great work friends that could be considered ‘work spouses’ by some definitions, but we NEVER considered or called each other that out of respect for our own spouses.”

How to Set Healthy Work Friendship Boundaries

For those who do build friendships at work, clear boundaries can help keep relationships positive and professional.

Grant offered a few tips:

  • You don’t have to socialize outside of work. You can bond over shared projects instead.
  • Be honest about work matters. Set expectations for giving and receiving feedback.
  • Set up regular check-ins. Use these to support each other’s growth and strengthen your connection.

Finding the Balance Between Work and Friendship

The workplace has changed, and so have workplace friendships. While employees may be more cautious about forming close bonds, research still shows that friendships at work can improve well-being and performance.

Even if today’s work friends aren’t lifelong companions, investing in positive relationships at work could pay off — both for personal happiness and career success.

FAQs

Are coworkers really your friends?

Coworkers can feel like friends, but the nature of the relationship is often different from friendships outside of work. Sharing long hours, dealing with the same pressures, and working toward common goals can create strong bonds. It’s natural to chat about personal lives, support each other during tough times, and even socialise outside the office. However, the friendship is often shaped by the workplace environment. Factors like competition for promotions, office politics, or simply the fact that the relationship is built around work rather than shared personal interests can create limits. Some coworkers do become lifelong friends, but many workplace friendships fade once people change jobs. There’s also a professional boundary that can make it harder to be fully open or vulnerable with work friends. Trust is often built within the context of work tasks rather than deep personal connections. That doesn’t mean workplace friendships aren’t valuable — they can make jobs more enjoyable, reduce stress, and even improve teamwork. The key is understanding that not all coworkers are true friends, and that’s okay. It’s possible to have meaningful, supportive relationships at work without expecting them to function the same way as friendships outside the office.

What is the 7 year rule for friendships?

The 7-year rule for friendships is an idea that suggests if a friendship lasts for seven years, it’s more likely to become a lifelong connection. While not based on formal scientific research, the concept reflects the belief that friendships surviving major life changes — such as career moves, relocations, or shifts in personal priorities — tend to have deeper foundations. The idea is that after seven years, you’ve likely experienced ups and downs together, learned how to navigate conflicts, and built a strong sense of trust and understanding. Friendships that don’t reach this point often fade because of changing circumstances, lack of effort, or simply growing apart. While the seven-year mark is a convenient symbol, the truth is that long-lasting friendships rely more on mutual effort, communication, and shared experiences than a specific timeframe. Some friendships can last decades without constant contact, while others might dissolve despite years of closeness. Ultimately, the 7-year rule is less about a strict deadline and more about highlighting that friendships capable of withstanding time and change have a stronger chance of enduring for life. It’s a reminder that lasting friendships need work, but the reward can be lifelong companionship.

Do work friendships last?

Work friendships can last, but many don’t survive once people leave a company. These friendships often grow quickly because coworkers spend so much time together, sharing daily routines, pressures, and even personal milestones. The shared experience of navigating the same workplace challenges can create a strong sense of connection, but the relationship is usually tied to the job itself. Once one person moves on, the bond can weaken, especially if regular contact stops or new work environments create different priorities. However, some work friendships do last long after jobs change, especially if there’s a genuine connection beyond the workplace. Friendships built on shared values, common interests outside of work, and strong personal support are more likely to continue. The key difference is that true friendships rely on ongoing effort from both sides, not just proximity at work. Technology makes staying in touch easier, but the reality is that without regular interaction, many work friendships naturally fade. That doesn’t mean they weren’t valuable — even short-term work friendships can make jobs more enjoyable, offer important emotional support, and leave lasting positive memories. Whether they endure or not often depends on whether they were real friendships or just friendly working relationships.

How to tell if someone is a bad friend?

A bad friend is someone who consistently shows a lack of care, respect, or support in the relationship. One clear sign is if they only reach out when they need something but disappear when you need help. They may dismiss your feelings, make fun of you in ways that feel cruel, or frequently break promises. Bad friends often show jealousy when good things happen for you, instead of celebrating your successes. They may also gossip about you behind your back or reveal things you shared in confidence. Another warning sign is if the friendship feels one-sided, with you always making the effort to keep in touch or organise plans. Bad friends can also be overly critical, putting you down instead of offering constructive feedback. In healthy friendships, both people feel valued, respected, and supported. With a bad friend, you might leave interactions feeling drained, anxious, or unsure of where you stand. Sometimes the signs are subtle, like constant competition or a refusal to apologise when they’ve hurt you. Ultimately, if someone regularly makes you feel worse about yourself or the friendship feels like work instead of a source of comfort, they may not be a good friend.